If You Really Loved Me You'd Let Me Eat Your Brain

Dear readers, I believe an anti-Clintonite may have gone too far this time.

Edward Klein's new book The Truth About Hillary claims the Bill raped Hillary back in 1979.

"I'm going back to my cottage to rape my wife," Klein quotes Bill Clinton as saying during a Bermuda getaway in 1979.

In the morning, the Clintons' room "looked like World War III. There are pillows and busted-up furniture all over the place," an unnamed source tells Klein.

Klein source claims Bill later learned Hillary was pregnant reading about it in the Arkansas Gazette.

"The fact that his wife didn't tell him that she was pregnant before she told a reporter doesn't seem to phase him one bit, because he says, 'Do you know what night that happened?"

"'No,' I say. 'When?"

"'It was Bermuda,' he says, 'And you were there!'"

Hmm. It could be true, since Bill has a well-established history of sexual harassment and rape. But if the Bermuda incident is true Bill just might be on the hook for it after all. His last-minute pardoning spree covered the "Gentleman Rapist from Little Rock, who has yet to be caught" but only for crimes committed in the state of Arkansas. Whoops!

Did Clinton's doctors find his missing nuclear launch code card when they cut him open yesterday?

Check out this funny blog entry. I think I like this person!

From USA Today (The Nation’s Coloring Book)

WASHINGTON (AP) — Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton, a possible White House candidate in 2008, joined 2004 nominee John Kerry and other Democrats Thursday in urging that Election Day be made a federal holiday to encourage voting.

She also pushed for legislation that would allow all ex-felons to vote.

Now, if I didn’t believe everything I read on the Internet I’d think one of my friends was setting a trap for me. Clinton? Ex-Felons? Vote? Those three terms should never be in such close proximity to one another, but there it is.

Under her proposal around 4.7 million ex-felons would regain their voting privileges in the 2006 election cycle. How will they vote? They've been institutionalized for part of their lives, which makes them Democrats by default in my mind. They've already captured the unions, teachers, college campuses, minorities, and the perpetually impoverished underclass created by their misplaced attempts at social engineering. What comes after the ex-felon vote? Palestinian prisoners? The French? Provisional ballots in the recreation yard?

A federal holiday for voting is something Kwik2Jujj has suggested to me before. Not such a bad idea, but do our federal and state employees really need another paid holiday?

One suggestion: Let's do it Iraqi style and dye our fingers when we vote. No dye, no discussing politics with me until the next election.